You hidden in my heart - Chapter 54.5

Chapter 54.5

Lu Yuling’s eyes shone with a deep intensity, like a cheetah’s gaze on its prey. 

Seeing that, Li Xining felt a jolt of shock. Her mind was full of various thoughts and she couldn’t think what to do.

In an instant, he pulled her close, flipping her over and pinning her down.

His eyes were shining with passion. His chest rising and falling with heavy breathing.

He was in a dilemma between logic and longing, and in the end, desire took the lead with little resistance. 

Without hesitation, he leaned in and captured Li Xining’s lips with a fervent bite.

He actually hadn’t slept at all. He was restless all night, battling the heat that was making him uncomfortable. 

Just now, after Li Xining left, his mind went with her. He could hear her in the kitchen washing dishes, then heating up some rice, and later, he heard her in the bathroom taking a shower. He even caught the sound of her turning off the lights.

After a moment, everything became quiet indicating the girl had fallen asleep, and he let out a sigh of relief, feeling a brief sense of safety wash over him. 

But he couldn’t sleep a wink as his mind was full of Li Xining. 

He felt like he was a traveller who was travelling in a desert login for water. And there was water just outside the closed door. 

He tried to control himself, squeezing his eyes shut and pushing away all the nagging thoughts. Every minute felt like a chance to finally find peace, until the alarm sounded from the living  room. In that instant, he realised he had completely failed. 

The disturbing and distracting thoughts turned into evil thoughts like he was possessed by a demon.

Hearing her footsteps getting closer and closer, his evil thoughts become more intense.

He was still trying to keep him under control, taking slow breaths, and pretending to drift off to sleep. 

Inside, he was a bundle of nerves, just wanting her to hurry up and leave. 

He had been holding it together, but every word she spoke felt like throwing gasoline on a fire, fueling his dark thoughts. When she said, “then you marry me”, he completely lost it. 

Li Xining froze, with her mind going blank. Everything unfolded so fast that she was left feeling confused and lifeless, like a puppet with no strings. 

The room was dim, filled with the sounds of their breathing and the rustle of clothes and sheets. 

He was new to all this, and his impatience showed, like a traveler desperate to escape the desert after a long trek. By the time Li Xining finally caught on, he was on the verge of getting what he wanted.

“Lu, Lu Yuling…” Her voice was trembling, and she even started to cry, “I’m scared…”

She was really scared and her body kept shaking.

“Don’t be scared…” Lu Yuling stroked her hair, comforting her. “I love you.”

He had never said “I love you” to her, and the first time he said it was at this moment.

Li Xining’s eyes suddenly filled with tears. She wasn’t sure if she was feeling touched, angry, or maybe a mix of both. All she wanted to do was cry, and soon enough, she let it out. It seemed like saying “I love you” came with a cost—something had to come to an end today. 

Lu Yuling was taken aback seeing her crying girlfriend and wanted to console her, but he found himself at a loss for words. 

In a flurry, he wiped away Li Xining’s tears and awkwardly repeated, “Please don’t cry, don’t cry…” 

After a few quiet sobs, Li Xining sniffled and said, “You have to treat me well.”

He promised her. “I’ll treat you well.” Looking deep into her eyes, he added, “In this life, I’ll only treat you well.” 

With tears in her eyes, she replied, “You have to keep your word.” 

“I’ll stick to my promise, if not I’ll lose my ability to hear and speak.” 

She fell silent. After a brief moment of hesitation, she awkwardly wrapped her arms around his back, feeling shy. She turned her gaze away, biting her lip, nervously anticipating what would happen next. 

But he didn’t make a move. After a couple of deep breaths, he awkwardly whispered, “Can you hold on for a bit? I need to go grab…”

Li Xining’s face flushed red with embarrassment, and she quickly pulled away from him, suddenly wishing she could take all her words back.

After Lu Yuling got dressed, he turned to her with a worried look and said, “You have to wait for me!” 

Li Xining just ignored him, pulling the blanket over her head and curling up in bed like a little kid. 

Lu Yuling was at a loss for words. All he could think about was hurrying back before she changed her mind completely. 

As she waited for him to return, Li Xining’s resolve started to waver. She couldn’t shake the feeling of uncertainty.

No one taught her what the right choice was.

However, when love was deep, it was the instinct of everyone in this world to be unable to control oneself.　

By the time Lu Yuling came back, Li Xining still couldn’t make a decision. 

When he hurriedly unpacked the package, she huddled in the quilt and asked in a low voice, “Can you?”

He knew what she meant. In fact, he didn’t know if he could do it, after all, he had no experience. ‘But, have you seen pigs run before you’ve eaten pork, right? Besides, this is a man’s instinct.’

So he replied, “Yes.”

Li Xining bit her lip, feeling anxious as she listened to the noises outside the thin blanket. Once he covered her up, she spoke softly, her voice shaking: “Just be gentle, okay?”  

“Sure,” he replied, lifting the quilt.  

Li Xining wrapped her arms around him again, trembling with nerves, but still leaned in to whisper, “I actually got you a birthday gift.”  

Lu Yuling caught on to what she was hinting at and couldn’t help but chuckle. “Maybe you should save it for next year?”

Li Xining bit her lip, feeling a mix of nerves as she listened closely. “It’s a set of Elixir strings,” she said quietly. Then she added, “Won’t they get rusty if we leave them until next year?” 

He leaned in, his breath warm against her ear. “Well, I won’t be rusty anymore.” 

Li Xining rolled her eyes. “…so shameless.” 

Lu Yuling just smiled. 

“I love you.” 

She wrapped her arms around him tightly and replied softly, “I love you too.” 

Outside, the moonlight spilled in like water, and the cicadas sang their night song. 

End of chapter 54

Have a nice day!